My front license plate.
My front license plate.
I usually only visit most of the
nudie bars I've listed on Saturday afternoons, I like the day shift at
most places the best!
3/5/2005: Wow, I visited some bars today
that forced me to add a new category: BOMB! This is, of course, WORSE then
Sucks!
4/23/2005: Lenny's Men's Club had to get a new category:
the DOUBLE BOMB
4/20/2007: Had to add another new category for Sassy Kat's: the SEVERE
DOG ALERT
| Key to Color Coding | |
| Currently okay | |
| Not so sure | |
| Sucks | |
| BOMB |
|
|
DOUBLE BOMB (Reserved for Lenny's Men's Club) |
|
|
SEVERE
DOG ALERT (Reserved for Sassy Kat's Showclub} |
|
| Closed | |
|
Bars and Restaurants in Indianapolis (in no particular order) |
|||
| Bar | Location | Scoop | |
|
Number 1 King’s Gourmet |
7143 N. Michigan Rd.; Northwest side of Indianapolis. |
This is my favorite place to have lunch. Go and have one of the
Japanese Combinations. The Number 12 is current favorite; the 10 &
11 have also been my favorites. This place sports THE SMALLEST sushi
bar I have ever seen but they turn it out --fast and cheap!! Some of
my buddies really like there Chinese food too. I haven't tried any
yet but I look forward to it.
|
|
| BadaBoomz Ale House and Grill | 4930 Lafayette Road (Suite E) on the Westside of Indianapolis; on the Northwest corner of the intersection of I-65 and Lafayette Rd. | 7/2007: New, brand new, went in for lunch and had the 1/2 pound fish sandwich; mighty tasty!! | |
| Bobby Joe's Beef and Brew |
4425 Southport Crossings Dr. Indianapolis; on the Southside of Indianapolis near the intersection of I-65 and Southport Road. |
Great food including constant fresh sea food specials! If you want
to go someplace nice, with a great menu that still has a "small pub"
atmosphere, this is the place to go. The Oyster's Rockefeller are
really good! 4/2006 update: I love this place! Especially when Cosmopolitans are the drink special! 7/2006 update: Try the San Francisco salad too! 7/2007 update: I bought my buddy Gave Burrows dinner here the other night. We split the Oyster's Rockefeller and each had a San Francisco salad and a big draft Dos Equis. It was just about the perfect meal! |
|
| Barringer's Tavern | 2535 S. Meridian St; on the near Southside of Indianapolis. | 7/31/2007: Someone sent me an email asking if this place was still run by a "coven of unfriendly women". I stopped for a beer on the way home from work and witnessed no nefarious activities nor Satanic rituals (during my short stay); they did have a really nice selection of "Daily Specials" however! One was crab cakes and zucchini fries; nice Summer fare. | |
| Judge's "Tip Of The Rib" Bar-B-Que | Northwest corner of Belmont and Michigan St.; on the Westside of Indianapolis, about 1/4 mile North of The Workingman's Friend restaurant. | Good smoky, tender beef brisket. The sauce is also very good; but I don't usually use it on brisket. | |
| Gia Bella's (used to be Oliver's Restaurant and Pub) | 3951 S Meridian St.; on the Northeast corner of Meridian and Hannah Av.; straight South of Downtown Indianapolis. | Italian! Great food and comfortable surroundings. My neighbors (Danny and Linda) come here all of the time. | |
| Rick's Cafe Boatyard | 4050 Dandy Trail; Westside of Indianapolis. |
I like this place. In the Summer you can sit on there deck and look
out over Eagle Creek Reservoir. I almost always stop here after
going sailing. It's a little pricey but what the heck!
6/9/07 update: It is with heavy heart that I change Rick's to a red rating. But is it my fault? No! This place SUCKS! The service at the outside bar, where I like to sit and "boat watch", has always been a bit slow. But the last couple of trips have been a trial of patience. I sit down, all the bartenders are yucking it up and seem to have complete tunnel vision (See RULES 3 E, and 3 F below). The first time this happened I tried for 15 minutes and I couldn't get their attention to order an appetizer; I finally left in disgust. The last time (6/9) I ordered the calamari and it took over 30 minutes to get it. HEY -- IT'S DEEP FRIED, it shouldn't take 15 minutes on a busy day! I've even added a new rule to express myself about the lackluster staff at this place. See new RULE 4 C, in addition to RULES 3 E, and 3 F below. |
|
| Cheeseburger In Paradise | 4670 Southport Crossings Dr. Indianapolis; on the Southside of Indianapolis near the intersection of I-65 and Southport Road. | Nice relaxed atmosphere -but sometimes very crowded! Owned by Jimmy Buffett; it has the true Parrot Head atmosphere! | |
| Oaken Barrel Brewing Company | 50 North Airport Parkway, Suite L, Greenwood; just South of Indianapolis on Main Street in Greenwood. |
Nice little brew pub; I always get the sampler. 11/2005 update: I've had the sampler 6 times now .... it's still my favorite! A bunch of little glasses; all of them full of beer, what's not to like?!?! 4/2007 update: I've had the sampler 12 times now .... it's still my favorite! After I finish The Sampler the waitress will always ask, "Do you know what you would like?", and I say, "Yes, another sampler please!". I stop in here and drink EVERY TIME I leave Courtney's house! |
|
|
Stew's Bar and Grille (used to be Day's End, The Emerald Pub, Jimmy Kelly's) |
Southeast corner of Smith Valley Rd. and US 135 in Greenwood. | Not a bad little place. I first went in to this bar about 15-20 years ago and I liked it. I didn't like it when it was the Emerald Pub. Now it is just as nice as it originally was. Stop in here when you are visiting my ex-neighbor's (Kevin Franklin) guitar store "Guitarworks", which is just across the street from here. | |
| Hagans Bar and Grill | 1121 E. Troy; about a block East of Shelby St. on the Southside of Indianapolis. | 7/7/2005: Stopped in here with my buddy Joe's girlfriend Angela on the way home from sailing. It was a Thursday at about 3:00pm. Nice looking place; friendly female bartender. My buddies tell me they may have THE BEST tenderloin sandwich in town! | |
| Big Daddy's | On Meridian St. at Pleasant Run Pkwy. |
8/2005: Stopped in here with my friend Courtney
Cassaday
on a Friday evening. She went to High School with a girl whose
family owns the place. Very nice place! 12/2006 update: Stopped in here wearing my Santa suit ... very Santa friendly attitude here! |
|
| Front Page Tavern | 310 Massachusetts Av.; Downtown Indianapolis. | 7/2005: My buddy Joe and I dropped off some furniture to my cousin (he has an apartment across the street from here), and wandered into this place for a beer. I really liked it and I will return soon! | |
|
The Loading Dock Pub (Mo's Loading Dock Pub) |
1045 N. Senate Av.; in the bottom level of the Stutz Building Downtown Indianapolis. |
Nice place but avoid it during the Artist's Open House festivities
at the Stutz Building. Way too many people in an otherwise nice,
cozy little place.
1/11/2006 update: Found out Wednesday is $1.50 bottled beer night, and also tried "Scott's Scottish Eggs": tasty!!! 12/18/2006 update: I like this place! 4/07 update: I have been stopping in here about every other week, usually on Thursdays; nice crowd of people. |
|
|
Lizard's (used to be Gary's Lounge or Gary's Bar; was nearly called The Bent Elbow) |
5002 Madison Av; at the Southeast corner of the intersection of Thompson and Madison; Southside of Indianapolis. 9/10 of a mile South of my house. |
This place has taken over as my
favorite neighborhood bar. It's a lot like The Colonial Tavern,
8/2005 update: Jeremy no longer owns the bar .... No more Calendar Girls; we'll have to see what happens. 9/19/2005 update: Now they have steaks. But the bar isn't as much fun as it used to be ... changed color to yellow and struckout above comment on brain-power. 12/2005 update: Yellow for sure. 4/07 update: Stopped in here twice recently and found an obnoxious crowd of under-achievers taking up bar-space. It'll be a while before I go back. 5/18/07 update: Ummm, free Coney Dogs on Sundays! This could get them back to green!! 6/3/07 update: Red! Went in to get a cheap beer and a free Coney Dog -- what I got was IGNORED! The bar just changed hands and is now Lizard's; no more Coney Dogs, AND I sat at the bar for several minutes while one staff member dicked-around with the juke box and another rearranged chairs (neither of which pay the light bill by the way). But I did recognize an analogy to "rearranging deck-chairs on the Titanic". See RULES 3 E, and 3 F below. |
|
|
Shigg's Diggs (used to be Tonix Bar and Grill) |
In the strip mall at the corner of Madison Av. and Edgewood Av. Southside of Indianapolis. |
Nice atmosphere and friendly people. I hear the food is good too,
but I just go there to drink and play that stupid NTN
trivia game. 8/2005 update: Since the change to Shigg's Diggs there is no NTN. No other real differences. But I went in there a lot for the NTN. 8/12/2005 update: The last 2 times that my buddy Joe and I have stopped in here (at around 6:00-6:30pm) it's been packed full of Catholics?!?! I got nothing against them; I just like to get a seat at the bar. 4/29/2007 update: Lot's of open seats at the bar ... because lots of people are standing up to watch NASCAR and there friends are reserving their seats. So, even though there was lots of open real estate I left because there was no place to sit at the bar. May go to yellow after next visit. |
|
|
O'Gara's Irish Pub (otherwise known as Johnnie O's; used to be The Main Street Tavern) |
Main St, in Beech Grove; Southeast side of Indianapolis | Just opened in December, 2003 by fellow Grover and Beech Grove High School buddy John O'Gara. The only place on Main Street where you can get a draft Killian's! Freshly remodeled and much improved over the last bar at the same location. | |
| Mirage |
Southwest corner of I-465 and Emerson Av. in Beech
Grove; on the Southeast side of Indianapolis. Recently moved to the strip mall at Emerson Av. and Churchman Av. in Beech Grove; on the Southeast side of Indianapolis. |
12/5/2003: The bar was featuring an all girl band (can't think of the name right now) that was really pretty good. Because of the band they also had a $5 cover charge that weekend. Drinks were a little pricey too. The crowd was younger (younger than my buddy Joe and I) but seemed okay. | |
| Galahad's | 71st St. and I-465 (Northeast corner of intersection); far Northwest side of Indianapolis |
Closest bar to my office!
Great tenderloin sandwich! 8/31/2007 update: Stopped in after work and had 3-4 buckets of beer (5 domestic beers for $10) with my office buddies. Nice new menu too! |
|
| Gatzby's | 71st St. and I-465 (Southwest corner of intersection); far Northwest side of Indianapolis | Second closest bar to my office. | |
|
The Colonial Inn (otherwise known as The Colonial Tavern) |
The point of Madison Av and Shelby St; Southside of Indianapolis |
Clark, my favorite bartender works here! Some of the cheapest drinks
in the free world AND .... the closest bar to my house; and that
counts for something!
9/1/2005 update: Scott Veatch, the evening cook, made me one of the best pizzas I have ever had! Here is a picture of it (click on it for a larger picture of the 14", 7 topping monster pizza). 7/2007 update: Scott Veatch has moved to Gallagher's (on South Emerson). BUT, my friend Angela Smith works 2-3 nights a week and she is lots of fun to look at!
|
|
| Hooters | Between Stop 11 & Southport Road on Highway 31; Greenwood, Indiana |
I hate MOST of the stuff about this place. But, I
like the selection of draft beers (Heineken &
Killian's included); AND, one day I was in there and
a bunch of the waitresses started running up behind
one another slapping each other on the ass. THEN they
would come over by the bar (where I was sitting) and
pull their little orange shorts up the crack of their
butts and show each other the red hand prints on
their cheeks while giggling like teenagers ... I
stayed alll day! update: They no longer have draft Heineken! 11/2005: Liliana was tending bar at Hooters during one of my visits; then I ran into her at Budweiser Fight Night boxing (Hooters girls wait tables there). So I had to buy a calendar from her ... 'cause she's in it! She's also my favorite Hooters girl!
4/28/06 update: Liliana was in this month's Hooters magazine (though they spelled her name Lilliana). Here is the spread:
|
|
| Green Door Lounge | Between US31 and Madison, on Thompson road.; South central Indianapolis | You just never know. Sometimes lot's of fun ... sometimes VERY disappointing. Well known for staying open as late as the law allows, this place brings in bar staff from other places that close earlier. | |
| Shallo's Antique Restaurant | 8811 Hardegan St; Indianapolis; Target Mall; at County Line Road; just north of Greenwood, Indiana | A vast selection of beers and good food make this place a long time favorite of mine. | |
|
The Dugout (otherwise known as Anthony's Dugout) |
621 Virginia Av.; just South of Downtown Indianapolis, Indiana |
The place where the cops go now that Ozzie's is
closed. Excellent pizza and an eclectic crowd. One night I met Bart
Simpson of The Blue Monkey Side Show here. 4/1/2005 update: Stopped in after seeing The Blue Monkey Side Show at the Fountain Square Theater. Had a great time at the show, and at the bar afterwards. 3/2006 update: Came in here again with Courtney; the bars' fun, Courtney's a pain in the ass. 6/2006 update: I wandered in here on a Saturday afternoon -- they had free pizza!
8/1/2007pdate: Stopped in on my way home from work. Always a casual place for a drink! |
|
| The Longacre Tavern | 5000 Block of South Madison; Southside of Indianapolis |
10/31/2003 update: I've gone into this place twice in the last 6 months and had a pretty good time. Both times there was a different, single, blonde woman sitting at the bar ... both times they were obviously quite insane -- but entertaining to talk to anyway. I'm upgrading the status from yellow to green! 11/19/2005 update: Well, I don't like the "pseudo-biker thing"
much, but where else would "pseudo-bikers" hang out? |
|
| Wirty's World | Corner of Madison and Hannah; Southside of Indianapolis |
Look for Ron the bartender have him make you a Long Island Iced Tea: 8/13/2005 update: Now they make pizzas; and they're good too!
4/07 update: Wirty sold the place but the name stayed. so did
Wirty. Every time I've been there lately he's been there! |
|
| BW-3 Grill & Pub |
Around 9000 S. Meridian; Greenwood, Indiana
(not in Google Earth) |
Tell me what you think about this: a friend and I walk in and sit at the bar. The female bartender asks us what we would like. We ask for 2 Killian's draught. My buddy says to her, "You've got large and regular size mugs don't you?". She says, "I don't know, this is my first day!", and just stands there, staring at us like we asked for the $2 hand-job special. Finally I asked if there might be someone in the building that could find out for the 3 of us (me, my friend, and the stupid bartender). She found out and then went to the other side of the bar and chatted with her friends --ignoring everyone else at the bar. (See the bottom of the page RULE 3 C) | |
| Carson Pub II | 711 E. Thompson Rd.: on Thompson Av. between Madison Av. and US 31 South; on the Southside of Indianapolis in a little strip mall. |
5/23/2003: Just opened recently and looks nice. The
original Carson Pub was destroyed last year in a
tornado. 4/2005 update: Nice little place. Usually pretty quiet; but that's the way I like 'em! 5/2007 update: Been in here 2 or 4 times lately. Still green! |
|
| The Workingman's Friend |
|
Belmont Av.; between Washington St. and Michigan St.; near Westside of Indianapolis. |
I love this place! Big, frosty schooners of beer,
excellent cheeseburgers (get the double when you go),
and homemade onion rings! The decor hasn't changed
in a looonnng time, and I like it -- it reminds me of
the places Mom and Dad would take my sister and I
when we were little. |
| The Eagle's Lodge | 712 Main St. in Beech Grove, Indiana | You have to be a member, or go with a member to get in. But lodges usually have a nice atmosphere; 'cause if you get thrown out, you don't get back in! Nice cheap drinks too. | |
| The Moose Lodge | 180 S. First St. in Beech Grove, Indiana | You have to be a member, or go with a member to get in. But lodges usually have a nice atmosphere; 'cause if you get thrown out, you don't get back in! Nice cheap drinks too. | |
| El Sol De Tala | 2 locations: Downtown in the old train station, and on the near Eastside of Indianapolis on the Northwest corner of Washington St. and Tacoma St. |
Restaurant:
Great Mexican food and the owner (Javier Amezcua) is
a blast. Tell him I sent you!
7/2006 update: The original location at Tacoma and Washington is closed and being renovated; I hope they re-open next month! 8/12/06 update: Mmmm ... still not re-opened. 9/23/06 update: Still not re-opened. 4/07 update: Still not re-opened. 8/07 update: Officially Closed! My buddies and I have gone to this place for about 25 years and we will certainly miss it. |
|
| Mama's House | Pendleton Pike and Post Road; in a strip mall on the southwest corner; far Eastside of Indianapolis |
Restaurant:
Excellent Korean Barbecue.
This place has always been in the top two of my favorite restaurants
in Indianapolis (and since El Sol De Tala is STILL closed, I guess
this is my number 1 favorite restaurant now). Find someone that knows how to cook Korean Barbecue and go to this place. You need a guide your first trip or 2 in and then you'll be hooked. |
|
| Kelly's Sunshine Inn | 5449 S. Harding St.; Southwest side of Indianapolis | Nice little place. | |
| Marty's Restaurant and Lounge | 4056 S. Keystone Av.; Southwest corner of Hannah Av. and Keystone Av.; Southside of Indianapolis |
Giant 1/2 lb. BLT sandwiches and the best turkey club
I've ever had also great weekend deals on prime rib
all at reasonable prices. 1/2006 update: No longer open 24 hours a day. Still one of my favorite places for casual dining! |
|
| LJ's Pub and Eatery | 3652 S. Meridian; straight South of Downtown Indianapolis. |
Haven't eaten here, but I sure have had some whiskeys! Good prices
and a friendly crowd; nice neighborhood bar. 8/26/2006 update:
12/9/2006 update: Nice big drinks and a casual crowd!! 8/12/2007 update: Hasn't changed! |
|
| Cobblestone Grill | 160 S. Main St.; Zionsville, Indiana | 12/2005: A bit pricey but what a nice place! The menu looks good to ... ruby trout -mmmm! | |
| Ocean World | 1206 West 86th St.; Northwest side of Indianapolis. | I've been here several times. At first just for sushi; then I tried one of the combo Japanese box lunches. I'd suggest trying one. | |
| Squealer's Award Winning Bar-B-Que | 5515 W 86th St.; Northwest side of Indianapolis. | Brisket, pulled pork, baby backs ... good stuff! Not a very big place so go early if you're having lunch. Ask for Kenneth who is an exceptionally entertaining waiter. | |
| Bryant's | 1729 South East St.; near Southside of Indianapolis | Neighborhood bar with cheap drinks! | |
| Community Bar & Grill | 1640 South Meridian St.; near Southside of Indianapolis | When we (Joe and I) walked in the bartender assumed we were Cops. Well mixed cocktails are the definite strong-point of this bar; and the crowd was friendly once they realized we meant no harm. | |
|
Red's Corner (used to be French Quarter) |
2137 South Meridian St; near Southside of Indianapolis |
7/2007 update: Re-opened as Red's Corner! Told ya! |
|
| Harley's Tin West | 10 W Hanna Ave; near Southside of Indianapolis |
A big place, a big empty place. The cute bartender got us drinks,
pulled out her cell phone, walked around the bar and plopped down on
a bar stool: causing the yellow rating. The place was virtually
empty. Was it empty and the bartender had become lackluster, or was
it empty because the bartender is lackluster? See rules 3B and 3E at
the bottom of the page. 12/9/2006 update: 'bout the same. |
|
| Vollrath Tavern | 118 E. Palmer St; near Southside of Indianapolis | Old bar. It's been the dame for as long as I can remember. Interesting neighborhood place; go early. | |
| Hoosier Pub | 1118 S Meridian St; near Southside of Indianapolis | 12/13/2006: Mmmm ... not sure. Pretty good sized crowd. None overly pretty, enthusiastic, or friendly. YELLOW! | |
| The Living Room Lounge |
934 N Pennsylvania St; Downtown Indianapolis |
12/18/2006: Nice neighborhood bar, everyone seemed quite friendly! 7/2/2007 update: Returned with my associate Angela Smith on a Monday afternoon; we had a really good time! |
|
| Johnny's Park Inn | 2531 Shelby St; near Southside of Indianapolis | 9/2007: Nice little neighborhood bar run by some Mexican folks. Very friendly with daily Mexican lunch specials! | |
| Gisela's Kaffeekranzchen | 112 S. Main St.; Zionsville, Indiana |
What a shame this place is closing 1/2006. The German fare is
excellent and it is a nice homey atmosphere. Closed!!! |
|
|
Fusion (used to be OZ, Ozzie's) |
Market Street, Downtown Indianapolis, Indiana |
Cop bar with good entertainment. The entertainment
comes from solo guitarists in the barroom, and the
medium to overly-large bands playing in the back room
(the "Blues Room"), and the cops, attorneys,
prosecutors and other folks who hang out and drink
here.
STRIKE THAT! Ozzie sold the bar in 2001 and it has become OZ a gay bar; now most of the old clientele go to The Dugout (see below). STRIKE THAT! Now, in 2002, the owners decided that they want a different kind of bar and "Fusion" is the name. It's supposed to be friendly to all. Should be called Confusion. (See the bottom of the page RULE 1 B) 10/2002 update: Fusion was named one of the top 2 new nightclubs in town ... what the hell is going on. 4/07 update: Closed! |
|
| J. R. Hohlier's Martini Bar | Northwest corner of Emerson Av and County Line Rd; just North of the Kroger store; far Southside of Indianapolis | Closed! | |
| Nudie Bars (in no particular order) | |||
| Bar | Location | Scoop | |
| Dancer's | 8013 W Washington St; on the Westside of Indianapolis, West of the I-465 loop. | 8/18/2007: Wow! Beautiful women, the first one I chatted with was from Nicaragua, the next from the Philippines, there was one other Oriental girl but I ran out of money before I could chat with her. | |
| Brad's Gold Showclub | 3551 Lafayette Rd; Westside of Indianapolis. |
9/2006: The highway's jammed with broken heroes on a last chance
power drive, and it looks like it will take me hours to get home. So
I decide to wait out the traffic here. Almost empty at 5:45pm when I
walked in, but several really attractive young women. The girl I
ended up talking with the most called herself Passion; a very
friendly 19 year old sweetie. 11/22/2006 update: 5 girls, 8 patrons, the girls were languid and insensible. They also ignored me. Went from green to yellow. |
|
| Wild Cheri | 4884 Crawfordsville Rd; Westside of Indianapolis -right across the road from the Speedway. |
Nudie bar:
4/8/2006: 4 friendly girls working there today. Pretty nice place! 7/3/2006 update: 2 friendly girls working ... still okay! 8/12/2006 update: NO GIRLS working! Just one attractive, but very pregnant, 19 year old waitress. 11/22/2006 update: Pretty nice time; most of the girls were fun, but --- 2 of the girls were very, very, high and could barely converse --- staying at yellow for now. 9/1/2007 update: Pretty hit and miss! |
|
| Sunset Strip | 2320 W. 16th St; Westside of Indianapolis. | Nudie bar: Mostly black girls, which is okay; but not when they are unfriendly black girls. They get a red rating for now. | |
|
Dreamweavers (used to be Leggs, The Dungeon) |
E. 10th St. and Emerson Av.; near Eastside of Indianapolis |
Nudie bar:
8/13/2005: Quick swing by for a beer in the afternoon. 2 girls
working, both fairly friendly. 2/18/2006 update: Saturday about 5pm; 5-6 girls, all very pleasant, none exceptionally beautiful! 7/3/2006 update: Huh, 4 girls and no business. It was okay for me! 11/22/2006 update: Huh, all of the girls that worked here before are gone. Only 2 girls working ... none very attractive. 8/4/2007 update: One girl working; could go to yellow on next visit. |
|
| Club Paradise | 5255 English Av.; near Eastside of Indianapolis |
Nudie bar: 11/1/03: First time in this place
in a long time. I got there on Saturday afternoon
about 5:00PM and stayed for a couple of beers.
Nothing really outstanding ... but nobody pissed me
off! 9/25/04 update: Early afternoon visit, the crowd was light but the girls friendly! 3/5/05 update: There were 1 or fewer girls working the last 3 visits I've made to this place on a Saturday afternoon. 8/27/05 update: Not too bad today. At 3: PM they had 3 girls working ... a definite improvement. 2/18/2006 update: 2 girls dancing; 1 had her "big 'ole lesbian girlfriend" at ringside. The bartender was acting as the waitress and I could NOT get her to bring me a beer. See RULES 3 E, and 3 F below. 8/4/2007 update: 4 girls working, all sitting around and ignoring me, the ONLY customer in the place (at 6pm on a Saturday). |
|
| Harem House | 8501 Pendleton Pike; far Northeast side of Indianapolis |
Nudie bar: 11/1/03: Showed up here at 11:00 PM
on a Saturday night. The $5 cover charge was nearly a
deal breaker for me but figured what the hell. The
staff seems to be made up largely of a group of
fairly attractive young women pushing hard to sell
$20 lap dances. 9/25/04 update: Early afternoon visit, most of the women were sitting at the bar bitching. May go to yellow after next visit. |
|
| Sassy Kat's Showclub (used to be The Men's Club, The In Zone, Ruthie's Lincoln Inn, Club Cheeks) | 1539 S. East St.; Corner of Lincoln St. and East St.; South central Indianapolis |
Nudie bar: The new owner (Todd) just took over from George and Miss Kitty.
It's open 3/5/05 update: The remodeling job looks great! Friendly crowd too. 8/27/05 update: Dead on Saturday afternoons, I hear it picks up in the evenings. 9/13/2005 update: Changed the color to yellow. Mainly because the bartender asked me for a dollar every time she walked by me; this is VERY annoying. 12/10/2005 update: Changed the color back to green. My last 2 trips were quite fun. Still a wide range of dancers: young and pretty to just the opposite, and fun and flirty to bitchy and overly business-like. Just ignore the foul tempered trolls. 7/3/2006 update: Teetering on Yellow. The hideous women do not out number the pretty ones; but they are really annoying. 8/5/2006 update: Shot from green straight to red! Why?? I'll tell you why; 3 girls working: Sissy, who looks like Uncle Fester with no teeth; Mad Dog, I don't know what she's mad about but the last part of the name is certainly appropriate; Dominica, large ... very large ass. and a small ... very small brain. 11/22/2006 update: The bar has changed owners and is now called Sassy Kat's ... who comes up with this stuff? Had a good time and elevated their status to yellow!
4/20/2007 update: There are 2 or 3 attractive women working here;
there are also some of the ugliest women I have ever seen; one looks
like her hair is glued on. Many of them come around and beg for
dollars for no reason, "Can I have a dollar, I ain't makin' no money
... ".
7/7/2007 update: Went in 2 or 3 times to see if things were any
different.
The Bad & The Ugly:
The Severe Dog Alert stays. 9/1/2007 update:
|
|
| The Red Garter Lounge | 437 S. Illinois St.; Downtown Indianapolis | Nudie bar: Update 10/31/2003: I finally went back into this place (I had free passes). A good-looking blonde stripper latched onto me when I first got there and she was lots of fun. My friend Dave ended up with another blonde who had kind of a funky Russian-esque accent. The place was REAL loud and Dave didn't understand something his stripper had said. He looked at me and asked, "What did she say?", and I told him she said something about, "We make big trouble for moose and squirrel!". We laughed like pirates!!! Pirate laughter makes me raise the rating from a long-time "red" to "yellow". | |
|
Silk-N-Lace (otherwise known as: Silk and Lace, Silk & Lace, Sunken Face, Filthy Disgrace ...) |
3512 Madison Ave.; South central Indianapolis |
Nudie bar: Closest to my house. If a strip club were a "bell curve" this would be missing the entire upper part of the curve. Women who work here are either young and inexperienced, or too old to work most other places. That does make for some interesting times though! 8/27/05 update: Yeah; everything's okay. 12/10/2005 update: Not bad. 7/3/2006 update: Some fun girls; look for Samantha! 8/5/2006 update: Runs hot and cold. 9/9/06 update: My all time favorite bartender Jennifer (the Greek Goddess) is working here again part-time. Look for a small, sexy, black-haired, mouthy woman; and that would be her! 11/22/2006 - 8/1/2007 update: You just never know ... sometimes this place is fun, sometimes it's not. Today it was so-so. |
|
|
Patty's Showclub
|
|
2014 W. Washington St.;
West Washington St. and Belmont Av.; somewhere
between the near Westside of Indianapolis and
Hell. |
Nudie bar: I walked into this place and was
shocked to find that I was the best
looking person in the bar, MALE OR FEMALE! Don't visit this place
unless you've got a "hairy ass" fetish, or always
wanted to date a female gym teacher (shudder). 7/31/04 update: And the bartender is slow as Hell! 3/5/05 update: The bartender is faster now and there was 1 person there who was better looking then me. 8/4/2005 update: Apparently some people DO look at my web page. I got a really nice email from the new manager of Patty's Showclub. I have upgraded the bar to "yellow" just because the new manager cares enough to do some research. I'll revisit the bar soon and write more! 11/19/2005 update: Not bad.
2/18/2006 update: Boy do they know how to find the crazy ones.
7/3/2006 update: Uhhhh, you might check this place out for the experience .... if you like what might be a BAD experience. 5/5/2007 update: Denise the day bartender is fun! 8/11/2007 update: Even the great personality of Denise the day bartender can't keep me coming back into this place. The psychotic 250 pound waitress kept yelled at me, "Don't touch my pants, NEVER DO THAT -- NEVER!!!". Uh, if they weren't so big I wouldn't be touching them. She was dusting the tables with her big-assed pants just walking through. Rating goes to RED until I find something more insulting. |
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Club Venus (used to be The Whitefront, then it was Stripper's Showclub) |
|
3535 W. 16th St.; near Westside of Indianapolis. |
Nudie bar: This place used to be REALLY rough.
Not much to fight about there these days; I was there
in the afternoon and only had 1 beer, I might try
again some other time. 2/2/2006 update: Thursday afternoon; pretty good time with the girls that were there. Left about 7:30pm. 7/3/2006 update: Most of the day girls that have been working here got fired!?!? I need to go back after the dust settles to see if I still like the place. 9/9/06 update: The staff has been rotating frequently. Still a fun place though! 7/14/2007 update: The Marion County Alcoholic Beverage Commission voted against renewing the liquor license for this place. I am certain the State Board will approve it. Why do I say that? Well, let me tell you that you don't have to be a MENSA member to figure this out (by the way I AM a MENSA member).
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Lenny's Gentlemen's Club (used to be The Bee Hive, then it was Hots) |
|
255 W.
Morris St. ~2 blocks East of old The Beehive; near
Southside of Indianapolis. |
Nudie bar: After The Copper Cage was about 200 feet from this
place, when it closed this place became
very quiet. Possibly the bars had a "satellite effect" on one
another, symbiotically helping each others business. Also, this
place has some of the most uncomfortable chairs I have ever sat in. 7/31/2004 update: A bit more lively on this visit ... still kind of sucks. 9/25/04 update: Early afternoon visit, almost had fun! 3/5/05 update: The dramatic drop in rank from yellow to BOMB was caused by a number of things including a waitress that just walks around and asks you for money ... "I ain't makin' no money -- can I have a dollar??" 4/9/05 update: Got there at 7:30pm, the dayshift girls had just stopped dancing. The night shift girls started dancing at about 8:10pm. No one danced in between, they just sat around and bitched -- I added a second bomb to the rating. 6/7/2005 update: Bored, I figured I would check out "the action" here at 10:00pm to see if it was possible that my other visits, usually afternoon visits, were just "mis-timed". I had 2 beers, tipped every heifer that asked me for a buck and figured things weren't too bad. Visit STILL sucked. 8/27/05 update: Drove past the place! 11/19/2005 update: The overall temperament of the bar has seemed to improve. A couple more good visits and I'll have to find a new bar to hate. 1/11/2006 update: I finally upgraded this place from "double bomb" to red. Maybe it's getting better, maybe I was just drunk, time will tell! 7/3/2006 update: Nearly reverted to double-bomb after this last visit. I'll work up some nerve and go back in. 8/5/2006 update: Got patted down at the door by some idiot so I can walk inside and and gaze in horror at the staff: double bomb it is! 7/30/2007 update: Hadn't been in for a while, STILL SUCKS! |
| Brad's Brass Flamingo | 4011 Southeastern Av.; a couple of miles Southeast of downtown Indianapolis. | Nudie bar: Lot's of people love this place; I don't. There's a cover charge and everything is pricey. Half of the time women won't even acknowledge your presence. | |
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Club Zeus (used to be The Body Shop, and The Madison Lounge) |
|
2718
Madison Av.; near Southside of Indianapolis. |
Nudie bar: I've been here a number of times on
Saturday during the day. It's kind of quiet, but can
be fun. Quick rotation of women and occasional
psycho-bitches working there keeps the rating at
yellow.
5/24/03 update: Ouch! What a pack of woofers in there today. Drank a beer as fast as I could and got the hell out! 4/13/2004 update: Much better now. 7/31/2004 update: Still okay! 4/9/2005 update: One more trip in like this one and they are going back to yellow. Drank 1 beer -AS FAST AS I COULD and left.
8/6/2005 update: Major road construction in front of the bar makes it nearly inaccessible. Only 1 girl working this afternoon. 2/18/2006 update: You talk about a place being hit-and-miss. This is a prime example. Sometimes it's a LOT of fun, other times it reminds me of the Morningside Funeral home from the movie Phantasm.
9/9/06 update: The bartender is the hottest thing there. Her name
is 11/22/2006 update: Just replace the struck out part above with this: Ashley, she's small, sexy, and adorable. 5/5/2007 update: Fast rotation of staff makes a solid opinion difficult ... but I had some fun! |
| Classy Chassy | 4444 S. Harding St.; just North of I-465 on the Southside. | Nudie bar: The day I went in all of the girls were ignoring me. I hate being ignored. | |
| Babes Showgirls | 7259 Pendleton Pike; Northeast side of Indianapolis | Boy was I drunk when I stopped here. I think it was fun though! | |
| Kentucky Klub | 2211 Kentucky Av; corner of Raymond St and Kentucky Av; Southwest side of Indianapolis. | 10/2007: Fairly new place; friendly people. I'll have to go back! | |
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The Copper Cage (used to be Twin Js, then it was The Beehive) |
|
Morris St. and West St. (near where West St. turns
into Bluff Av.); near Southside of Indianapolis. |
Nudie bar: 4/13/2004 -- Closed! |
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Bars and Restaurants Not in Indianapolis (in no particular order) |
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| Bar | Location | Scoop | |
| Kiss Restaurant |
2nd Road (behind Mike’s Shopping Mall); Pattaya, Thailand |
2/07: Open 24 hours! My TG (Thai
Girlfriend) and I went for a late dinner at 3:00am and had a really
good time. Took a long walk back to the hotel and watched a plethora
of drunks, idiots, bargirls, and ladyboys staggering home. Oh, it's
cheap too!
|
|
| Five Star Thai Cuisine |
5124 Pine Island Ct #M Crown Point, Indiana |
8/2007: I've been here twice now and this is a nice comfy place for dinner! So far I've only had the "#37 Basil Dish", but it is good! Make sure you get a fried egg with it if you are going authentic. | |
| The Clinton | 200 Clinton St.; Salamanca, New York | Nice big burgers, specials include tacos on Thursdays and Fish Fry on Fridays! Look for Todd Foy when you stop in ... just on the off chance that he's there. | |
| Miller's Tavern | North Vernon, Indiana; 202 E Walnut St. | Nice little corner neighborhood bar. I had the special: "Gourmet Potato Soup", it was quite tasty. I also had their grilled chicken breast sandwich and found it to be a good choice also. AND CHEAP BEER. | |
|
Red's Place (some people call it Red's Tavern -- and they would be wrong) |
Bargersville, Indiana; just West of SR 135; 75 North Baldwin Street. | Great place! Free chicken wings on Wednesday, and free fish fry on Thursday. Combined with cheap drinks and a friendly crowd, this place HAS to be a favorite. | |
| The Tasty Shop Tavern | Edinburgh, Indiana; 510 W. Center Cross Street (SR 252). | 9/15/2005: Went to Camp Atterbury to shoot my new rifle; had to stop for a beer afterwards and chose this place. Kind of divey, but I like that; friendly people and cheap beer get it the green label! | |
| Zoobie's | Greenfield, Indiana; between I-70 and Main Street in Greenfield (also known as Washington Street in Indianapolis, National Road , or US-40) on SR-9 (also known as North State Street in Greenfield) | 9/2/2005: Nice place; John Hannefey and I went here at about 4:00pm. We had giant draft Killian's beers, and the deep fried platter. The owner came by and gave some snacks to try out ... for free!!! | |
| Jesse's Pool Room Bar | Ciudad Acuña, Mexico |
Great border bar with the cheapest beer in Acuna at
$1 a bottle. Friendly folks (most don't speak
English) who are most entertaining. Stop here and get
tanked before getting the cab to Boy's Town (don't
forget your knife) and spending $4 a beer. Pictures: |
|
| The Raccoon Saloon | Boerne, Texas; at the edge of town. | I stayed in this town for 3 days and had a great time. The owner, Derek, loves Heineken and chili. They have a real cool porch out back with 3 or 4 smokers ready to go. Nothing really going on when I was in town, I just enjoyed hanging out with the locals. The other bar in town, The Long Branch, is just down the street, but it was mainly a hang out for the older, domino-playing set. | |
| Offshore Ale Company | Kennebec Av; Oak Bluffs, MA (Martha's Vineyard) | Good micro-brew beers and excellent burgers and pizza (try the Double Garlic). In September 2000 this place was lots of fun, seems that now (May 2002) it has calmed down significantly; possibly in-part due to breaking RULE 1 A (see below) by closing whenever-in-the-hell they get tired of being there. | |
| The Lamppost | 111 Circuit Av, Oak Bluffs, MA (Martha's Vineyard) | This place and The Rare Duck share a building ... and staff ... and, well, everything. The Lamppost is the upstairs bar, The Rare Duck is in the basement. Some of the most beautiful Bulgarian girls I have ever seen work here. | |
| The Rare Duck | 111 Circuit Av, Oak Bluffs, MA (Martha's Vineyard) | See The Lamppost (above). Oh ... this bar has live entertainment occasionally. | |
| The Ritz Cafe | 4 Circuit Av, Oak Bluffs, Massachusetts (Martha's Vineyard) | Great place to have a beer when in Oak Bluffs. Known as "the locals bar" I find this place to be my preferred stop for early afternoon beverages when on Martha's Vineyard. | |
| The White Horse Tavern | Corner of Farewell and Marlborough Street, Newport, RI | Built in 1673, this is the oldest operating tavern in the USA. Great food, friendly staff. Look for Mark the bartender! | |
| Seoul Garden | 1820 W. Coliseum Blvd., Fort Wayne, IN | Restaurant: A little family run place with good Korean food. I go here about 3-4 times a year. | |
| Big Dog Courthouse Pub | Goshen IN; north central Indiana | Closed! | |
I like my bars the way I like my enemies: DEAD!
Mark Hopkins 4/8/06
Mark Hopkins' rules for a bar/restaurant not to suck:
DON'T CONFUSE THE CUSTOMER.
Never alter opening or closing hours. Make up your mind and stick with it; nobody likes a flake. If I show up and you aren't open during posted hours, I will probably never return. Example: The Colonial Inn was always open until 3 AM, but when a new owner came in some of the girls decided that they would close when they thought the crowd was "light". Well, a lot of people would come in after everyplace else had closed and suddenly, after 20 or 30 years, the door is locked at Midnight. Now the bar is open until 3 AM again, but they lost the trust of the late-night crowd and they no longer frequent the establishment.
Don't play "fast and
loose" with the bar's format. Is it a cowboy
bar, a gay bar, a disco, or just what the hell is
it? OZZIE'S was the local "cop bar"; then it became
OZ, a "gay bar"; after about a year it's FUSION, a
"headbanger bar". It makes it hard to decide what
to wear to the place doesn't it!?!?!?!
DON'T ANNOY THE CUSTOMER.
If you are a jerk and
own a bar -- DON'T TALK TO THE CUSTOMERS.
Things might go better if you don't talk to the
help too! A few doses of "demoralization" can
terminally screw a business. (Also see 4 B)
TRAIN YOUR SERVERS.
Take care of a customers problems. At a fairly expensive Mexican restaurant bar a girl handed me a can of beer with a hole in it. The hole had obviously been there for a while, the can was half-empty, and the remaining beer was completely flat. It was several minutes before I could get the attention of the young, female bartender (see 3E) who was busy chatting with friends at the other end of the bar and when I explained the problem she said, "Oh that's too bad ... do you want to buy another can?".
Don't let your employees sit at the bar --unless they are off work and buying drinks. Many times I have been in places where the bar was completely packed with people, only to realize that 3 or 4 of the people were servers or greeters who just wanted to take a load off and talk to the other employees while depriving a paying customer of a seat.
Greet the customer in a polite manner. "Can I help you?" "May I get you something?" "Would you like a drink?" are all nice polite, fairly informal ways of ascertaining what you might do to meet a customer's needs. Walking over to the customer, jerking your head back, and looking down your nose at a customer implies that you may be retarded more than anything else.
Don't disrespect a customers aesthetics. Don't dump cigarette ashes or other crap in a plate someone has just been eating from (at least not in front of them). It makes a person wonder if it might be okay to piss in the salad bar.
Beware of "tunnel visioned" employees. They keep their eyes pointed downward as they work and when they do look up they "scan" the area low, at bar level, without noticing that people trying to get their attention.
Don't ignore the customers: Once, I watched a bartender load a cooler with beer for several minutes, when I finally got the stupid bitch's attention she told me, "I'll be done in a few minutes, you aren't going to die.". I complained to the manager about her cavalier attitude towards service and he backed her up. I wrote a 3 page letter to the corporate headquarters of the bar .... and I ended up getting my way.
Train your employees in the goods and
services that you are offering: Have the employees learn what
food and drink you offer. They should be familiar with the menu and
many types pf beverages that they are going to HAVE to talk to a
customer about; otherwise you ALL look like idiots.
MISCELLANEOUS THINGS TO AVOID.
Don't "overgrow" the crowd you are looking for: Let's look at Whirty's World opened by the coach at the local Catholic high school: In the beginning it had a small, pub-like quality. It was one large room with a long bar on one side and tables on the other. It was simple, it was friendly, and it was A WINNER. Some of my friends would come into town and want to go there immediately --not now! So Whirty got this great idea of expanding into other rooms of the building TWICE. A pool room and a band room with a stage were added. Now the place sucks.
Don't be a dick.
Don't rest on your laurels: For instance: Rick's Cafe Boatyard! Used to be great, but pricey. Now it's just pricey.
Send me some e-mail:
Reset 9/23/2005
I
was driving past this place and thought I would take a look and see
if the Severe Dog Alert
should be removed. As I was having a (free) hotdog a dancer
got on stage who looked remarkably like Howard Sprague, only not as
neat. I left the hotdog and about half of a beer during my rapid
retreat from the bar.
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